Lucky

Have you ever had one of those days, weeks, or even months where you just feel so lost? You wonder if what you are doing is what you really want or is it just the fact that it's convenient the real reason you do whatever you do. You lie awake thinking at night wondering "What am I doing with my life?". Then when you finally reassure yourself that you can accomplish all this things you've set out to do, work hard to reach your full potential, and just be the best you can be - things just come crashing down. The things that you work so hard for, you lose. You feel like you've gotten worse instead of improving yourself. And the worst thing of all- is when you're best just isn't good enough. On top of that there's drama with your crew, your friends, your family, and worse of all you feel like you've let someone you really love and care about down. You want to be there to support them but they just end up shutting you out. But for some reason, the moment you hit rock bottom is when you start to realize all good that you've got.
Those questions about "what am I doing with my life?" You realize that you should be thankful for being alive. The goals you want to achieve, you feel lucky to have the opportunity to even reach for them. And even if your best wasn't good enough, you still have other opportunities to receive recognition for doing the best you can do.
Yeah, there is drama with your crew, your friends, and your family- but you feel lucky to even have an amazing group of people who care about you and support you. The crew that always has your back even when you lose, the friends that are always down for you even when you are being a pain in the ass, and the family that raised you and love you even if at times they don't understand you.
Then the person that you feel you have let down because they just won't let you in...you realize how damn lucky you are that they are in your life and chose to be with you. Of course, there are going to be things both of you have to overcome but at the end of the day there is someone that returns the love you have for them. You have someone that is in love with you just as much as you are in love with them and that is something very hard to come across.
It's a shame that it's only when you hit rock bottom that you realize these things. It's only when you've hit rock bottom that you can climb to the top again. This weekend made me realize how lucky I am to have all these things.

"Life shouldn't revolve around all the things you don't have, life's about what you've been through, and what you've got."